The Lazy Observer
I feel really ugly and uncomfortable in my own skin, do you have any advice on how to feel more confident in public and in life generally. Ps I love you sooooo much :*
Anonymous

fullten:

Okay so, this is you

image

I wanted to draw out all the bodies I could think of, but that would take forever, so in the place of your body is a violent constantly changing squiggle. 

Which is pretty close. 

Your constantly changing body is the only thing holding you onto this planet. Your body is neither good, nor bad. It just exists.  And It only exists for a very short amount of time before it deteriorates and dies. 

The love I have for myself isn’t because of my body, but because my body is what enables me to exist in the first place. My body is the house of my beliefs, my ideas, who I am.  I decide whether I lean towards good, or bad, not my body or someone else’s ideas of my body. 

I understand that society sells you a way to be. But that is lie. We live in a consumerist culture where low self esteem = big money. There are people in tall towers who falsely look down on you, as they sit in meetings thinking up new ways for you to feel terrible about yourself so they can sell you something to fix a problem that isn’t even there. Your body has never been, nor will it ever be, a problem. That is a false idea. Just because some ideas are widely believed does not make them true, it just shows that most humans don’t like to question the world around them. It’s human for this to get to you, it’s everywhere, all media and society will feed you this flattened, unattainable idea to you of what ‘beautiful’ is. It’s bullshit. Your beauty does not sell jeans. Your beauty cannot be photoshopped to push shampoo. Your beauty is deeper, it means something, it flows in your veins, in your humanity, in your decency. Even if you feel that sting of not belonging, that’s fine, that’s human, but don’t hate yourself, or your body for that.  If you don’t fit the mold, amazing, your body is revolutionary, it is yours to do with as you please. Tattoo it, fill it with good food, throw it out of planes (with a parachute preferably), share it with people who are going to make you and your body feel amazing, keep safe from those who want to abuse it, narcissistically look at it in the mirror, decorate it… enjoy it. You exist, emotions such as feeling awkward, or feeling like you don’t belong are all apart of the human experience, our short tiny blip of existence, don’t waste it hating your body when there is absolutely nothing wrong with your body at all. You’ve been feed false ideals, your body has been, and always will be ideal, enjoy your skin, it holds everything you are, everything you were, and everything you will be. It holds all your potential. Thank it. 

fullten:

I’m honestly kind of flabbergasted by the amount of ‘What happened to my country’ ‘When did American become this…?’ on my dash. 

Whose land do you think we’re on? 

Who do you think built it? 

This is not new, this is typical. This is expected. This is recurring. 

We are just the new generation now dealing with the monster that is America. It is new to us, but it is not new to history. 

fullten:

hermannsparka:

fullten is probably one of the best people on this website

Aww you’re sweet <3 

I would have to disagree. fullten is THE best person on this website (or really any website, I’d imagine).
I don&#8217;t know where this is from, but I can&#8217;t stop laughing.

I don’t know where this is from, but I can’t stop laughing.

Hey Ten, I'm 21 and I feel torn about wanting to date and the idea of dating. Like, I want to try dating and having a relationship but at the same time I feel that I'm not emotionally mature enough to maintain one yet. Not only that I find it really difficult to connect with others and have been told that it's because I have high standards and I should lower them. But I seen dating advice say be picky and stand firm because you know what you want which I stand by. What's your opinion on this?
Anonymous

fullten:

NEVER LOWER YOUR FUCKING STANDARDS 

Look, I see it over and over and over again. Girls lower their standards, end up with assholes, over and over and over again, and then Mr Luke Warm Decent Guy comes along and they treat him like he’s the fucking holy grail, when in reality, he is the most mediocre motherfucker to walk the planet, but because he’s not an asshole constantly, just sometimes, he seems sooo amazing. NO. Don’t do that to yourself. Keep your standards high, don’t touch the peasants. 

And relationships, is all communication, that’s all it is. It’s not hard work, people just act like it is, and if it is really hard work to stay together, then maybe these people shouldn’t be together. That’s all there is too it.  The person you are with should make you, not just happy, but amazed. They should push you to be a better person, they should be happy when you accomplish something, they should know all your demons and not be scared by them, their should be passion, and this person should set you on fire. Don’t settle for luke warm dude. 

This woman is an absolute genius who tolerates no crap. I wish there were a lot more people like her in the world. I really do.

fremsley:

Linking back to this simply because nobody listens to Scarce, and so very few know/remember them.  And to not have heard Obviously Midnight at least once in one’s life would be a definite loss.

I absolutely love Scarce! I’m so glad you posted this, but I agree with what you said. I not only got to see Scarce play in Chicago a few times in the early to mid-90’s, but I got to see them play at the (since closed) Luminaire in London a few years ago, where they debuted a documentary about the band, which is love to remake, since it wasn’t shot or recorded very well at all (it was amateur fan-created) and they deserve the best-looking (and sounding!) documentary possible!